What the technician should have said: There will be loud noises, some of which will sound like the emergency response to a nuclear attack. Try not to freak out. Remember to breathe.
In his defense, the tech did offer me headphones with the choice of "country or opera." I thought neither of these choices would be particularly conducive to lying very very still which is what I was supposed to do for the next half hour, so I went with the earplugs instead.
I am grateful for my yoga practice and even my less than successful attempts to meditate on a regular basis. Focusing on my breath, was hugely helpful in keeping me still and calm.
That MRI they use on House is a lot bigger than the tiny cylinder they put me in.
I made a joke about all the bad things that seem to happen to people during MRIs on House. The technician did not laugh. This made me very nervous.
I thought I was an exemplary patient. I was very very still - even though my nose started itching about 5 minutes in and it drove me crazy. I tried to think of cheery responses to his intermittent questions of "Are you okay, Miss?" (Did I mention he called me Miss?) I was disappointed that I didn't get any compliments on my wonderful perfect-patientness from the technician. He just told me to have a nice day and pointed me back toward the dressing room.
With the earplugs, the technician's voice sounded tinny and scratchy and thousands of miles away. It sounded as if he were monitoring me from the international space station.
Every once in a while, the machine would make a sound very similar to a bird chirping. I found this oddly reassuring.
They sent me home with a disc of my images and I consulted an expert as to whether or not I should look at them before my appointment tomorrow.