I learned a few things about myself during this last bout of whatever the hell it was that knocked all of us on our collective asses last week. Flu? Very bad cold? Whatever it was, it consisted of snottiness and coughing and fever and achiness and misery.
I learned that a lot of my self worth is wrapped up in being high functioning and energetic. When I am not those things I feel bad, unlovable.
The sympathy I so readily feel for my family when they're ill is hard to apply to myself. Really I spend most of the time I'm sick thinking that I should just get up and soldier on.
Just because you're sick does not mean you're not creating laundry or dirty dishes. Even when sick, meals must still appear on a regular basis.
When I'm sick, I don't want you to say "what can I do for you?" I want you to pick one of the one hundred things that need to be done and just do it.
If you ask me if I need help, I will most likely say no. If I say yes, I would like you to do the one thing I ask you to do in a timely manner.
I'm cranky if I can't run.
Every clock in my house displays a different time. Under normal circumstances I find this charming - when I'm sick it drives me crazy.
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There's nothing like a patch of adversity to illuminate what bothers us--about ourselves and others. Be kind to yourself--you are always doing your best, even when your best falls far short of your normal efforts. Sending you loving thoughts...
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